Misunderstood

David spoke at a UVU conference about "being misunderstood" after he had gotten thousands of hateful, angry replies to a tweet he had posted online which was a quote from a General Conference relating to what family means to HIM.

 (I am not going to post the specific tweet because my MAIN focus here is on the words "being misunderstood" and what that can do to someone).

David stated: "though I do firmly believe in God's order of the family, never had I intended to imply homophobic, belittling, political statements, however the damage had been done"

"I was now living what had ALWAYS been my fear before my Mission: of being misunderstood and taken the wrong way".

When I heard David speak about this feeling and "fear of being misunderstood and things taken the wrong way", that it was his worst nightmare, it resonated with me so much, because I have felt this way so many times myself, and believe me, it is an awful, awful feeling.

For me, I can tell you that when I "fear being misunderstood and things taken the wrong way",  it makes me not want to trust, not want to open up to people, not want to be on social media, not want to engage. It makes me withdraw and pushes me further back, further away from people where I honestly don't even want to communicate with anyone.

It is very hard for me to be on social media where people who don't know you can easily misinterpret your intention, judge you wrongly based on their own assumptions, and I can only imagine for David how it must be a million times harder with so many voices online.

He said it was his worst fear and I can relate to that.  If you've been misundertood many times over, you begin to not even trust yourself anymore...you know in your heart what you mean, but to have negative thoughts thrown back at you, and you know you're intentions were good, it really hurts. Because I put a lot of thought into what I'm going to say, when it gets misinterpreted, I have a hard time dealing with that. For some, speaking up or speaking their minds, comes easily. For me, it takes a lot of courage to even speak up sometimes.

Sometimes I just have to stay away from social media and interacting online (I totally understand why David must feel like this at times) because I see so many people jump to conclusions and judgments about others way too quickly, without any thought.

I always always remind myself that I don't know a person well enough to make harsh judgments about them. I don't know their life, their heart, or what they've been through to make them say or do the things they do. And, yes, I'm not perfect, and I know I, too, am guilty of judging others at times too, in my head or, perhaps I've talked to someone, a friend, about it, but I still reflect upon the fact that I shouldn't and I try to refrain from posting any of these judgments I may have because I don't really know them, and I try really hard not to say anything online to offend someone, even if I feel I have been offended.  

Maybe you can understand this maybe not, but you see, since I do put so much thought into things, for me to be misunderstood or my intentions not understood, it just really makes me sad, because I know I'm always trying to look at the other person's side of things or feelings.  I felt just as bad when it happened to Davd.

I wish people weren't so quick to post whatever they feel like, without any thought, of how it might really hurt another.

The worst feeling in the world is when you know someone has the completely wrong impression of you...and there is nothing you can do about it. I know the feeling and it sucks. I guess it boils down to accepting that people really don't know who you are deep down inside.

Emotional scars are just as important to me as physical scars.  They can bring a person's soul and worth down to nothing and it's very hard to build yourself up again, especially when some people don't even have a big support system.   It's important to have at least one person who will listen and understand.

God has been my savior and I talk to him all the time, and David's music has uplifted me many times, but it's good to have a family member or at least, one or two friends you can lean on when you're really feeling down about being misunderstood by others because I can tell you by my own experience that it ate away at my soul and made me feel very down, and it's not easy to pick yourself back up again.