Happiness

Happiness --

Hard to explain.
I never feel it.
I'm too concerned about all the bad things that go on in the world.
All the hatred.

I'm trying so hard to just work on myself and find peace within me
and to love myself for who I am.

I've suffered a lot of loss in life and it's just been really hard to just be OK.

There are too many people in the world who suffer to be Happy.
There are too many people in need to be happy.

I feel too guilty to be happy.
There are too many less fortunate people to be happy.

I can't say I am never Happy.
There ARE moments that bring me happiness.
But, for the most part, I do not necessarily feel it inside.

I am grateful for every day little things.
But, my mind always is thinking about the bad things that go
on in the world.  The people who lose others unexpectedly,
or in an accident, and when I think of all the people who
suffer through tragedies, of any kind, I just cannot FEEL HAPPY.